When it comes to s3x, “getting wet” doesn’t refer to getting busy in the shower or having s3x on the beach. Instead, it’s about natural vaginal lubrication, also called arousal fluid.
The lubrication your body produces when you’re turned on is different from your everyday vaginal discharge. This kind of lubrication is primarily coming from your Bartholin’s glands, which are located on either side of your vaginal opening, instead of the glands on the walls of your cervix.
The best way to “get wet” is to spend a lot of time getting turned on before you begin any penetrative activity. Kissing, making out, dry-humping, dirty talk, and other forms of foreplay will help you get aroused and get wet.
However, many people don’t produce enough lubrication to make vaginal penetration feel good, even if their minds and bodies are extremely turned on. This is called arousal nonconcordance, and it’s particularly common for people with vaginas.
“Arousal nonconcordance is a mismatch between how turned on a person feels and how their genitals are behaving,” s3x educator and author of Come As You Are, Emily Nagoski previously told Refinery29. “It’s nearly universal; almost every woman will, at some point, experience it, just as almost every man experiences erectile issues.”
There are a ton of factors can lead to decreased lubrication, including using hormonal birth control, breastfeeding, taking medications like antihistamines or antidepressants, smoking cigarettes, or even not drinking enough water.